Alba Jigga Second Semester: March 2008

Ritual for Me?

Super Sweet Sixteen. The popular Mtv show popularized what has become almost a ritual in modern America today. Teens have a big party to celebrate the popular birthday. When it came time for me to turn sixteen, my mother decided to bring all my friends and family together for a dinner at Buca di Beppo in Universal City Walk. The thirty something friends and family came to my house and then we were all driven to the restaurant. Its not like I got a new car or anything over the top as seen on tv, but the party was more than I could ever ask for. My friends and family were all there to celebrate my big day. But what did this big day really mean to me? Nothing.
For me, the dinner didn’t give me any right of passage. I didn’t feel any wiser or older than I already was. That’s how it is with every year that passes for me. I believe that I slowly grow over time, age, learn, and develop. It cannot just happen in one split second where you turn that one year older. As a teen in high school, I’ve gone to many of my friend’s cultural growing rituals such as bat mitzvah or quincieneras. These rituals involve religion which I lack. Their faith brings them to a certain point and their families view them as growing into adults etc. There is part of me that wishes I could’ve danced in a court with my closest friends in a hotel ball room; most of me though is thankful that I never did because it would be fake. Until I truly believe or have faith in a certain culture or religion, I wouldn’t be able to truly enjoy and embrace the customs and rituals that come with association. I’m happy that I’ve grown to slowly to discover what I truly believe in and have had the freedom to do that.

What is Expected

My existential belief as a teen girl growing up in Los Angeles could be different from what people might expect. When people observe me, they see a tall brown haired white valley girl. The way I act does not depict any psychological problems so my social and family life must be pretty solid. I could be expected to act snoody, bratty, or spoiled. I am probably expected by many to go to school for a while and then get married and not have to work, have children, and play mom. This is what society might feel my obligation is.
The truth is I am totally different than what you might think. I am from two worlds. I am half Mexican decent and my views of society and my future dynamics would surprise most people. From 7th grade, disectnig a frog didn’t make me run away screaming to the girls bathroom, but instead fascinated me. Its only natural I would want to pursue the practice and be a surgical nurse when I age. I attended a catholic school, but ironically enough I’m not an atheist. I don’t believe in a higher being. I believe we are just here by science and circumstantial evidence. We have the ability to make decisions in our lives and I am going to do something productive and not expected. I don’t want to marry, but I do want to be in love all of my life and sadly enough, children disgust me. So despite what society might expect me to contribute from what they see, my existential views might bring something even greater and productive to the world in the future.